I finished my slightly less-rough draft on Sunday, which might be considered another milestone if it wasn't so nebulous. This rewrite focused on making the pieces of the plot fit together better and getting to know the characters.
When I first sent the script out for coverage in December (the fine folks at hollywoodlitsales.com did bang-up job, as always), their feedback said that they couldn't tell which of the four kids is the protagonist.
To that charge, I've got to plead guilty. My original concept was to have the film be a true ensemble piece, with all four kids taking equal parts. But those, of course, are almost always unsatisfying.
My tough kid, Dillon, is the only one whose home life we see. In fact, his relationship with his ex-con father forms the spine of the whole piece. So it only makes sense that he would become the protagonist.
I didn't have to weaken any of my other characters or shove them aside. I just had to put Dillon front and center, by introducing him in the very first scene and refracting everything through his point of view. As a result, he grew, became a little less tough, a little more brooding, and a lot more complex. And when seen through his eyes, the other characters became much more real.
On this next rewrite, I hope to fill in some of the details about Wonderland, the decrepit amusement park they sneak into. And I've got to punch up the dialogue, make it less cliched.
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